Archive for December, 2005

Things that make me happy

When I was travelling around the country teaching speech and debate [no seriously, i did that], I had a tradition with Drew, my best friend on the team. That tradition involved our inability to sing coupled with our partial knowledge of the lyrics to “My Favorite Things.” I’m told the result was hilarious, but we just did it so we could yell “WHEN THE DOG BITES, WHEN THE BEE STINGS, WHEN I’M FEELING SAD!”

Thanks to General Psychology, I know that the tendency to act crazy in big groups is called deindividuation. It’s where you are so overwhelmed and in the moment that you do things you might not normally do. I think it’s kind of like being drunk on adrenaline. Or those times when I chase squirrels because, hey, it’s a squirrel!

Next to me is the most beautiful girl in the world. She’s sleeping at the moment, curled up with her head closest to me. I have to wake her up in 4 minutes. Don’t worry. I’m not about to make a joke about her not being beautiful upon waking. That’s the last thought on my mind. I just wanted to make that clear. I’m not thinking like that.

My favorite thing in the world right now is having her near. I forget that sometimes – isn’t it funny how that works? Become so comfortable with something that it seems… uncomfortable? Only it isn’t. You’re simply having flashbacks to your previous “comfort.” And for a moment you think it was better. This is called “hindsight bias” according to my GenPsych textbook. It is when you think the past was better than it was.

Can I seriously think that before I knew this treasure, this amazing person who complements me in every way imagined [i can only hope I’m as perfect for her], I was better off? At best it meant I could go be a guy with the guys and not have to worry about it. And I might not stay up as late on the phone.

In reality it meant I was alone. I didn’t have anyone who wanted to hug me a lot, sit close to me, cuddle with me, talk to me always or just sit with me as much as possible. I didn’t have someone who challenged me in a lot of ways, taught me a ton of things, and called me out on my little bad habits.

I was supposed to wake her up 2 minutes ago, and I will as soon as this is posted. Sitting here for the past hour as she slept just reminded me how beautiful it is now that she’s mine.

Cheesy? Yeah of course – if you’re not in love. But if you are, then you completely understand. She’s mine, and I’m hers. Only sometimes I fail, because I’m headstrong and stuck in my habits. With that in mind, I’m learning to deindividuate myself from these stupid habits and traits, to become single minded with her. As much as possible.

I just needed to remind myself, and her if she finds this, that she’s one of my favorite things. I don’t need whiskers on kittens, raindrops on roses, or brown paper packages tied up with string. I have Hilary, and every day is more fun, and exciting.


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Ok I know this is old school, but when you’re a poor college student looking to give a really nice gift, you sink low.

I want to give an important girl in my life a laptop – as close to free as possible, for her to be able to continue to develop her photography skills. She needs more storage and editing capabilities than she currently has.

An Apple iBook if I’ve ever heard one… so I’m trying to get one through the freepay site. Let’s see if it works. Here’s my referral, you don’t have to of course, but consider it an easy Christmas present.

Free Laptops

feel free to e-mail me – peacefulchaos AT gmail.com – if you have any questions. Thanks, humble internet.

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How does Coldplay make such beautiful music?

They have the whole package it seems; their lyrics are beautiful but relevant, their music flows so well.

Examples? How does Chris Martin make howling so beautiful towards the end of The Scientist?

How did they know that 3 repetitive chords would have such a powerful effect in Fix You.

How do they make “For you I’d bleed myself dry” such a romantic thought?

Yes, I am continually in awe of the power of Coldplay. I’m beginning to regret that I was unable to see them in Birmingham or Nashville. It would have been amazing.

Go listen to Amsterdam, off of A Rush of Blood to the Head. It’s a gorgeous song. Notice how it starts out with what seems to be a sonar ping from a submarine. The song starts out with a down note, a sound of sinking. And it ends with “You came along and you cut me loose.”

I want to create stuff like this. You can’t not appreciate their talent, even if you don’t like their music. It’s kind of like calling Van Gogh an amateur.

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